Where to now?

My work buddies and I were at this Godfather-themed cozy little place last Friday. Over pizza and pasta, our conversation turned to what twenty-somethings mostly talk about: what to do with the rest of our lives.

Honestly, when you’re 17, the rest of your life pans out perfectly before your eyes. Graduate at 21. Work till you earn enough for a house, a car, and some savings. Then get married at 28. Have kids. Live happily ever after. Die.

But right after graduation, we’ve been jolted into this nightmare called reality. Life, it turns out, isn’t at all what you imagined when you were this bright-eyed, hopeful teenager. In this reality, you don’t often get the job you’ve dreamt of. And you might never get it. You might not also meet the partner of your dreams. And most importantly, you might not live happily ever after. 

Me (top right) with work buddies at Joey Pepperoni, Salcedo Village branch

One of my work buddies – who also happens to be one of my closest college friends – asked that, if everything was within our control – where would we be in five years?

And I was stumped. I didn’t know what to answer. I don’t even know where I’ll be next year! There are options but no clear choices. I’m living in limbo-ville.

For the past two years, I’ve blamed everything except myself for not being able to write fiction, sketch little imaginings, or begin *that* project. I always say I don’t have time – but I do have time. I just waste it on Plurk, Twitter, Flickr, Multiply and all these substitutes for what I really should be doing.

I always say that I want my life to glorify God but honestly, it doesn’t look like it’s going that road. There must be some reason why I am where I am but it has not kicked it just yet.

When I finally meet my Maker, I want to hear, “Well done, my good and faithful servant.” But I fear that I will not.

There’s still time. May the adage “Youth is wasted on the young” not apply to me.